Detachment and intimacy
"Love is the real Dominant" -Strider
I find eroticism to be a curious beast. Tonight I detached, I thought of projects and poems, dreamed and was not present for much of the sex- a very weird thing for me, the connectivity junkie. But after *amazing* food (steak, zucchini, parmesan oil bread, garlic potatoes), good cigars, good company, and yet again seeing the Incredibles- I just wanted to zone... I packed, we talked, but I wasn't expecting the sex... so I wasn't in the right headspace. Plus my cut just feels off... just not really in the mood... but that wouldn't make me say no :)
It's just strange. Hm. Yeah, no matter how much I engage, part of me still feels down. I think I just need to cuddle with my Furry... I want to be home. Friday, friday, friday... the mantra of my modern life. You'd think I work a 9-5.
In the other room Dancer sleeps and Strider snores. I had to wake myself up to write back to a fan, who had read the scat report and been dismayed about my "path to stardom"... WTF- This is not about that. This has nothing to do with my professional face at all. Yes, my fans can read my journal- but this quest is about me, and the lives around me, not a visage and a package for sale. Yes, the package is for sale... but y'all are just along for the ride as I quest down the information superhighway for my off ramps in life.
This is me- raw, unedited. Welcome to the Mortal City.