PS030 - BDSM Roulette

Mar 25

Written By

Episode: https://shows.acast.com/660e243b2f834f0017de9181/episodes/660e2440acbcaf00174d9942

Welcome to the edge of random known as the internet. After being randomly struck recently on his trip down internet lane, Lee takes you on a journey into the internet through four searches: “BDSM,” “Rope Bondage,” “Italian Salad Dressing Fetish,” and “Frog Porn.” Along the way he discusses bondage passion and safety, modern art installations, transgender issues, kink 101, zip ties, and more. Let’s take a romp, and see where the tubes lead us!

Dan:
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Announcer:
Welcome to Erotic Awakening, an exploration of all things erotic.

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Then every Monday, you'll hear from our various guest hosts.

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Lee:
Hello, fellow adventurers of sexuality and spirit, and welcome to Erotic Awakening with Lee Harrington.

In this monthly show, I am a big fan of discussing life, the universe, and everything, as it were, talking about different topics around BDSM, sexuality, sacred sex, sacred kink, and everything in between.

Usually, I either talk about my life and adventures, or discuss a very specific topic with either a class concept in mind, or as an opportunity to interview somebody on the show.

However, this month, I'd like to try something a little bit different.

Today's concept is BDSM Roulette.

Now, we've all had that moment where we hopped on the internet and typed in some random topic.

A lot of us, after looking at the websites that came up, also hop over on to images.

Now, one of the interesting things that happens when you type in, say, BDSM and look at images is that you get all kinds of images and you never know exactly what's gonna turn up.

So today, I'm gonna be typing in different words, seeing what pops up in the first couple of pages and having an adventure with it.

All right, you all buckled in?

Ready for an adventure?

If so, let's get going.

Our first word that gets typed into Google Images is BDSM.

Now, I'm not entirely sure how these systems get sorted and whatnot, but I appreciate that the first three images that pop up under BDSM are a tied up nun with a penis pointed at her, a frankenfurter strangling riff raff from the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and a pair of what seem like potentially femdomes standing or sitting in this crouched position on a pair of men in zentai suits as random people wander by not noticing.

Now, I think personally, this is absolutely delightful, if slightly surreal.

What I love, though, is that that second image actually does have some sort of cultural value looking at the world at large right now in mass media.

Two days ago, or at this point, maybe three or four by the time you listen to it, Richard O'Brien, who was the director for the Rocky Horror Picture Show, came out as being in the gender spectrum.

They've identified as being 70% male.

And what's really interesting about this article that came out from BBC was that it talked about the idea of a gender spectrum.

Now, a lot of articles about transsexuality, they come from this place where it's like, you start at one place and you end at another.

And for a lot of people who are transgender, transsexual, or trans-asteric, as it were, that is a piece of reality, that they were mislabeled at birth, or that they are male to male.

They were born male, but they happened to be raised female, but that's not their fault.

Male to male, that they were always male, and now they're seen as men that they are.

But Richard O'Brien argues otherwise, at least for themselves.

They commented about the idea that they're unique and beautiful and that other people are too.

And I think that's a really delightful thing.

With the other two images, though, it's a little bit of a puzzle.

I'm staring specifically at the image that is the nun with the flushed out face and the very large pert anti-gravity breasts.

Now, the Rope Bondage, for what it is, isn't bad.

It's kind of a chest harness thing with some shoulder straps, an extra strap that goes around the waist.

And then a different waistline that goes down and attaches to some ankles in a really beautiful deep red.

I personally like rope.

Rope is a big...

I'm a big fan of it, you know?

But a plastic doll-like nun in the rope isn't my kink.

What I also think is really interesting is that the person with the penis pointing towards the nun seems to be in a red cloak or perhaps some sort of other red garb that's flowing around them.

I personally wonder sometimes when I look at the internet whether the images that pop up and whether the fantasies and interests that pop up are things that people are interested in or whether they just happen to be random concepts.

I myself am interested in all variety of things.

Not every single thing that's out there.

There are certain things that I can tell you I'm not into.

But I really think that if you're into something, you could probably find it on the internet.

Now, the one thing that I haven't been able to find so far is an Italian salad dressing fetish because I met somebody who had one.

So I'm going to see what happens if I type in Italian salad dressing fetish.

What we get in the first couple of images are Italian salads, different Italian salads, more Italian salads.

But then it's revealed on the second line on the far right side that there is an image of a woman with three small things in front of her, but she's laying back with her RTH, her reinforced toe and heel stockings, barely visible, little black patent leather shoes, holding a long cigarette holder, looking very seductive.

And on the next piece down is a picture of, of course, Dita Von Teese in full, fabulous, polished latex with a whip, looking very, very serious.

Now, I find it really interesting, the combinations, how these things start to turn up.

What is the logic, the concept, that leads to these things being found?

In the case of the woman holding the cigarette holder, looking very seductive in her reinforced toe and heel pieces, it is because it's related to FashionArtToronto.ca's piece on Maja Z, Fashion Fetish.

Now, the show about Fashion Fetish states that this project is consisted of a video installation and six sculptures slash objects.

The content of the video will...

This grammar is horrible.

I wonder if it was originally written in French and translated.

Will will in artistic manner go through history of fashion, its fetishes, clothing, body, desires, jewelry, divas, makeup, et cetera.

And for the sculptural part, the six objects I would use, frames to put inside some fashion objects, fetishes to produce 3D collages.

And those pieces by Maja R.

Ozengovic.

I, Ozengovic?

We'll run with Ozengovic, born in Belgrade, Serbia.

What I love about fashion installations and three-dimensional installations in the art world is that really if you can explain it in some way, shape or form, it's obviously art.

Obviously, I've gotten to go to shows where it was a giant pile of candy in one corner.

Now, in the case of that one, it was actually a really heartbreaking installation.

It was a piece about HIV, and the beginning of the piece says, come, grab a piece of candy.

And then there was a plaque on the side that said that with every single piece of candy that goes away, it's a metaphor for another man who died from HIV.

And at the very beginning of the show, they start out with this giant, giant, giant pile of candy, right?

This heap that fills up the entirety of the corner.

And a month later, each time the show ends, it's down to the third of the size it was, if not smaller.

I got to go not long ago to an art installation by Nailand Blake that was showing in San Francisco at the MoMA.

I had the opportunity to travel with a bundle of us, and so we went and saw the show.

And one of the pieces that was really interesting to me was this video installation of sorts.

What you do is you record the piece and using your own smartphone or your own, whatever multimedia device you travel around with.

And there was this list of questions on the wall, tons of props in the room.

You could wear a tutu, you could put a wig on.

There were different backdrops.

And you were encouraged to answer one or more of these questions and then post it online.

That way, people all over the world had an opportunity to listen to what your answers were.

Though thinking about it, it actually wasn't at SF MoMA.

It was actually over at the Yerba Buena Cultural Center.

So with that said, I think it's time to go on to the next round of BDSM Roulette.

And let's type in the words Rope Bondage.

For the images for Rope Bondage, the first image that appears is a blonde woman in a gray kind of midline underwear with a white body harness over the top of it.

The second is an anime piece.

The third one has a gag over the top of her mouth and seems to be wearing some sort of German ethnic costume.

I'm not entirely sure what, but it's really interesting that as I scroll down, there's actually a fairly good diversity of images, predominantly Caucasian and Asian woman.

In fact, I don't think I've seen people of any other ethnic background.

Some people that I recognize a couple lines down, I see an image of Winona, who's a fantastic model.

I've worked with a number of times.

But whoever this blonde woman is, she does seem to appear quite a lot.

Now, one of the things we get to, a number of lines down, that I'm horribly disappointed in, is the fetish rope line.

So I really have an issue sometimes with some of the products that are sold in sex shops.

And that doesn't make those products bad.

That doesn't make those products negative.

It doesn't mean any of that kind of stuff.

But it does make me wonder at the concept of investment in tools.

Now, don't get me wrong.

I love the stuff that I've purchased from Rope Extremes, the stuff that I have purchased from Bind Me in the Netherlands.

I've bought beautiful stuff from Twisted Monk.

I adore the work of a number of different rope producers.

It's fantastic.

However, I am not just underwhelmed, but deeply unimpressed slash not okay when I see products at sex shops labeled Japanese Silk Bondage Rope, that are in fact polyester, that are in fact scratchy and slightly unpleasant, and in no way shape or form are Japanese.

They're made in China.

The only thing I can think of that makes them Japanese is that they have some sort of Japanese anime cartoon on them.

That's it.

That's all we got.

I'm underwhelmed and I am unimpressed.

So the question is why do they do it?

What is the purpose?

And the answer is because it sells.

It sells.

If I just say rope, you'll wonder, oh, well, why don't I just get this from Home Depot or from some other home department place where I can pick up wood and rope and lubricant and all of that kind of stuff.

And by lubricant, I'm meaning WD-40.

Though I'm always kind of excited when I am in Home Depot and I see them both on the same aisle, it's kind of cool.

But no, it sells.

And especially with the current wave of 50 Shades Of Grey and all of that kind of movement of people spicing up their sex lives, having things that are pretty packaged and say, oh, try me out.

I'm hot.

I'm exciting.

Sells.

So the question is, why don't people just buy rope at Home Depot?

And my answer is, do.

If you don't know if you're actually really into rope bondage, you don't know if you're gonna love it, you don't know if you really want to invest a dollar per foot for that really high-end jute or treated hemp, then don't do it.

Go to Home Depot or whatever your local favorite shop is.

Even better, go to your neighborhood hardware shop and support your local businesses.

That would be great.

And buy yourself a hundred feet of some random rope, some sort of boat mooring line, perhaps, or thicker clothesline, something that you think feels good in your hands, or your partner says feels good when they rub it around on the inside of their forearm.

Try it out.

Take it home and cut that hundred foot piece of rope into four pieces, 25 foot lengths.

When you cut it, either whip the two sets of what are going to become the ends of the rope ahead of time, or cut them using some sort of long lighter if it is a polyester or nylon rope because those ends are going to melt.

And then you take afterwards, you just kind of file off the ends so they're not sharp anymore because sharp edges on your rope are not sexy unless you're that kind of sadist or that kind of masochist.

So I say 25 foot lengths because that's about what you're going to need for a two column tie that's then attached to a bed.

And by two columns, I mean two wrists tied together, two ankles tied together, a wrist and an ankle tied together and then pulled off to the sides.

For a lot of people, a basic chest harness is going to be, you know, again, a wrap or two below the breasts, a wrap or two above the breasts and some sort of thin shoulder strap, about 25, 30 feet.

This works really well.

Now, if you know you're just going to do a single column tie around a wrist and attach it up to a bed frame, take one of those 25-foot pieces and cut it in half to a 12-and-a-half foot piece.

Again, this works really well because 12-and-a-half feet is enough to go around a wrist three times, tie it off really securely in some way, shape, or form with a Somerville Bowlin.

You can YouTube that, but I'll put a link up.

Or with a one-column tie.

And then tether it off to the bed frame or whatever it is that you're using to tie somebody down with.

You don't have to invest in huge amounts of money to be able to have a really hot date.

It's just like you don't have to buy a really high-end blindfold to get your needs met there as well.

That free blindfold you got in the airplane works great.

A silk scarf from somebody's collection works great.

If you even want to use a bandana that you keep in your back pocket, especially for those of you who like flagging and letting people know in the world what you're really into, fantastic.

A blindfold can be made out of that back pocket hankie, or you could use that to tie around your partner's wrists, and voila, you're done.

You don't have to invest hundreds of dollars in gear to be able to get going with your kink.

Have fun with what you already have in your house.

A piece of rope, perhaps it's a wooden spoon from your kitchen.

These things can start for a fantastic scene, and if you've been in the kink community for a long time, consider stripping yourself down to just what you have in your house, and I don't mean what's in your toy box or toy bag or hidden underneath your bed or prominently displayed on your walls, depending on who you are.

Try stripping yourself down to the basics.

Now, there are some basics that are not the best idea.

I am so distressed by the fact that in the Fifty Shades Of Grey trilogy, which I am finishing up Book 3 right now, because I think it's important for myself as an educator to have an awareness of what the mass media information is producing right now, so that I can tell people in their own language when I meet people at universities or at sex shops for educational classes how to be able to speak in their language of what I am actually presenting as safer material.

One of the things that is not safe, that is offered in Fifty Shades Of Grey, is zip ties.

Now, those are those cable ties, those things that bundle stuff up.

They're really fast.

They're really easy.

They're a quick way to get something tied up, and if nobody is going to be moving, it's not a horrible idea.

But if somebody is going to be struggling in any way, shape, or form, those things cut in worse than handcuffs.

They can chafe.

They can in some cases actually open up the skin.

And if they're tethered down too tight, they can cut off circulation, especially if somebody has been in them for a while or somebody's body is leaning on top of them, or their hands are lifted up over their head.

And if they're tied too tight, there's not an ability to slide in a pair of emergency shears or a pair of bandage scissors to be able to cut those things off.

With zip ties, you cannot open them back up without something sharp to cut them.

And though I know a lot of people that a knife, they think that a knife is gonna work really, really well, if you're trying to slide a blade in between somebody's wrists to then kind of ratchet it open and cut, that's bringing some sharp things really, really close to some really important arteries and veins.

I personally don't really recommend it.

Now, of course, if we're doing BDSM Roulette, I have to choose something random, right?

Something that I haven't looked up before, et cetera.

So my two-word combination is going to be frog porn.

Okay, then.

So in the first two rows alone, I'm not sure whether to be delighted or slightly distressed.

I think I'm going to vote with distressed on some of these because, okay, two clay frogs looking at each other seductively, that's fine.

The next one being Kermit the Frog watching two frogs having sex.

What seems to be some sort of chat discussion because, yeah, the chat discussion reads out, anyone got some frog porns?

Where it's a frog saying it.

You want frog porn?

What's wrong with you, man?

Is the other guy on the other end?

I'm trying to figure out how to make more frogs.

Is the response from the original frog.

Now, this is actually a funny piece to me specifically because I got to read an article recently about panda porn.

Now, that might sound really absurd.

Panda porn?

Like, is it pandas having sex?

Well, yes, but not for humans.

It turns out that there's a zoo in China where a pair of healthy pandas stopped being intimate with one another, which is concerning because pandas are an endangered species and they're trying to up the population.

And so they made videos of different pandas in other places copulating, and they proceeded to then mix this together in like a panda porn longer video moshup and then put up a large screen television next to the panda, you know, cage.

I'm not sure what you would consider enclave.

Anyway, whatever, put it up next to the pandas.

And the male panda started to be interested and started to watch and then eventually the female panda also became interested.

And within a couple of weeks, the panda started having sex again.

I find this delightful.

Panda porn.

And it's not panda porn in the way that kink.com has been shooting panda porn of people wearing giant panda costumes, which I am convinced every single one of their sites has had panda porn because they bought these giant panda costumes.

And if you buy panda costumes for one site, it makes sense to me that producers would go, we should have panda porn on all of our sites just to get our, you know, our money's worth.

Now, there's on the first couple of lines of panda porn, there's a couple of other images of not panda, excuse me, panda porn is on my mind now, frog porn, which is what I've looked up.

A couple of images of just frogs having sex with frogs.

But there are three that I find not necessarily my thing.

I guess one of them could be, actually, you know, who am I to say?

Who am I to say, right?

Somebody's into it.

One involves a person flipped backwards over a couch so that their head is on the ground and their feet are up at the top of the couch.

This person has a cock shoved all the way down their throat with the balls hanging down towards their face.

And then you see the giant ass of the person whose balls they are.

And then their head is disappearing, I would assume, to be able to have it basically be an upside down 69.

It looks uncomfortable.

I'd probably be game, but mostly that it looks uncomfortable.

I think there'd be possibility here for some sort of geometry, because when you have group sex, there's this entire issue around how do you put all of the bodies together to have all of the bodies have space to do their thing.

And I think this would work okay if the person whose cock it was, if their legs were closer together, if there's some sort of head support, because the person whose cock it is could be able to be fucked from behind with the person sucking their cocks head not being in the way.

So that's kind of cool.

I'm all for that.

The next one is a large inflatable female frog latex costume with a rather lengthy, I'd say two foot long green cock on the front, also inflatable made of the latex.

That's some creative stuff.

I'm wondering, I'm going to look this up soon, if this is made by the same people who had the latex orca costume, which is totally cool.

I'm all about it.

In fact, I'm going to look right now.

And the answer is horny toad from Naughty Bits.

Oh no, this is just some sort of site informing us of the weird things on the internet.

And I think we're sure by BDSM Roulette that we're pretty aware of just some of the weird things on the internet.

So the last one, though, is I'm pretty sure it's from Genki Genki, and it's this nude woman covered in frogs.

And I mean covered in frogs.

And they seem to all be live frogs.

And there's a frog entering into her mouth.

I'm fascinated by the entire movement and fetish around small live animals and sexual interaction that, whether it's worms or fish or whatever it might be, I'm mostly concerned about the health and well-being of the animals because really if it's a slug and then you ejaculate on it, you're going to have a dead slug because there's a high salt content there, and that's just rude, right?

That's just rude in my opinion.

You know, if it somehow accidentally happens, I'm not entirely sure how you'd accidentally kill a slug, but it happens, right?

Actually, I can think of a couple of ways that you could accidentally kill a slug, but with that all said, I'm mostly concerned about the welfare of the animals.

I actually went on the Genki website at one point, and they had all these videos of different sorts where it's like, you know, women with lobsters or women with whatever, right?

And they did have one video of a woman having sex with a dog.

What was interesting to me was that they said that they would never make a video with a woman having sex with a dog again, because even though the dog was interested, the dog being long haired had a lot of problem under the hotlights of the video shooting and proceeded to get very, very ill.

And they didn't want to do that to a mammal that that was not okay for them.

And I thought that was a really interesting point to make.

And thinking of dog porn and dog sex and all that kind of stuff, I do also appreciate that there are different laws in different parts of the world around whether this is legal or not.

And I'm not going to go into that here, but I was fascinated when I was up in Ontario.

What was it?

Alberta.

Excuse me.

When I was up in Alberta and I went to a BDSM 101 class.

Maybe it was a Kink 101 class.

I think it was a Kink 101 class.

And they were talking about spanking and flogging and caning.

And in the middle of all of it, just seemingly random to me, they brought up canine, having sex with canines.

And they said that it was really important to be aware that if you are cruising for animal role playing situations, that you need to be really aware that what people are looking for is actual animal role playing, not having sex with dogs.

Because in Alberta, there's apparently a club or two, or spaces or two where that's what the club is about.

It's about having sex with canines, born canines, cis canines as it were, cis versus trans.

Anyway, I think it's funny.

Cisgender, transgender, cis species, trans species.

I actually know some people who consider themselves trans species.

Anywho, that it was really important for them to distinguish between them because that would be an unfortunate occurrence.

To think you're going to one and then getting the other.

That's just awkward.

And that's because in some parts of Alberta, this apparently is legal, or at least it was a couple of years ago when I saw this lecture.

So it's something to keep in mind.

So with that, I think we're going to wrap up for this month.

This round of BDSM Roulette.

We have gone through BDSM, Rope Bondage, Italian Salad Dressing Fetish, and Frog Porn.

Did we do any others?

Maybe.

Anyway, it's all good.

So whether you have questions about any of the topics that we brought up in today's show, or if you have other ideas or thoughts, or questions, of course, around sexuality, spirituality, kink, gender, connection, identity, or anything else, please feel free to send your questions to lee, L-E-E, at passionandsoul.com.

That's passionandsoul.com.

With the subject line, Ask Lee.

Questions will be looked at to either be put up on this podcast or to be posted on my website, passionandsoul.com.

You can find me anywhere on the internet by doing a search for Lee Harrington, or Passion And Soul as one word, whether that's on fetlife.com, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, DeviantArt, or really almost anywhere.

So thank you so much, fellow adventurers of sexuality and spirit for joining me.

This has been Erotic Awakening with Lee Harrington, and until next time, stay cool, have fun, be authentically you, and have a fantastic journey.
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