PS038 - Clothing and Fetish Wear

Dec 19

Written By

Episode: https://shows.acast.com/660e243b2f834f0017de9181/episodes/660e2440acbcaf00174d993a

Whether it is something silky and secret we are wearing underneath it all, or something shiny we are strutting for the world to see, clothing is a powerful tool for erotic exploration. After discussing roleplaying and exhibitionism, surrender and empowerment, Lee dives into the topic of fetish wear and sexy clothes for men. Having clothes (or their removal) serve a role in our sex lives is something that everyone should have a chance to enjoy. Get dressed up, get dressed down, and dress for desire!

[music intro]
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Lee:

Hello, fellow adventurers of sexuality and spirit, and welcome to Erotic Awakening with Lee Harrington.

It is cold.

I mean, I'm just going to say that straight up for a lot of us around the United States at least and through Canada.

It's cold.

The temperature has dropped, storms have come across the land, and I am blessed right now, though, that though it is cold up here in beautiful Anchorage, Alaska, it's not nearly as cold as it was before.

We have actually come above freezing, and I am peeking out right now at some blue skies.

It's amazing.

However, as I have been going through my life and changing up clothes and figuring out what works for what seasons and how does it change that you just need more long johns, for example, living up here in Anchorage, that I've been thinking about clothing a lot.

I've been thinking about how it fits on my body.

I have been thinking about how I enjoy a tight pair of jeans being pulled up over my calves, my thighs, pulled up around my ass and zipped tight.

I've been thinking about boots and the act of polishing them having gone to a play party recently with a beautiful punk femme on her knees.

Her daddy, her sir, I'm not quite exactly what their dynamic was, on the couch smiling at her as he continued on with the conversation.

Her work making those boots shine, those boots that he takes steps with out into the world.

I think too often in the world of sexuality and kink, we think about clothing as being something that is focused on those who are either doing it for role playing or doing it because they have a paraphilia or a fetish.

Now, these are both really important things to discuss.

So let's set those two things in first.

Role playing.

God, it is amazing to have even those little props of clothing to get us into the mood of characters that were playing in the bedroom or playing out at a party or maybe even in the world at large.

That there is a different experience that happens when I am kneeling in front of somebody in their sweatpants and t-shirt.

Then when I am kneeling in front of somebody who is wearing a pair of leather chaps, leather boots, and a cross harness across their chest, cover on their head.

There is a difference to me when I am walking side by side with someone who is wearing their heavy jacket and a pair of dirty overalls, than it is to have them in frilly black underpants, a matching see-through bra, six-inch stiletto heels.

There is a difference.

Now, there are undoubtedly people who have fetishes and desires for sweatpants and for overalls.

In fact, I think overalls are really hot.

The fact that you can wear one strap undone and all you have to do is push the other strap off the shoulder and they are naked and on display.

That's fun and very sexy.

But when we talk about using it for role playing, those things can be great for role playing too.

The overalls become the opportunity for me to have dirty, greasy sex with a construction worker.

Yeah, that those little items of clothing can paint a difference between woman and naughty nun.

They can paint the difference between man and naughty nun.

That we have the possibility of crafting our fantasy with something as simple as a nurse's cap.

Even the modern nurses don't even wear those things.

But our iconic image can be crafted in our mind's eye.

That our iconic image can be pulled upon.

Think for yourself, if you're going to be doing a role playing scenario, what clothing tools can be used to make that more pulled upon?

If you are role playing being a satanic priest, what would you wear?

If you are role playing being a human pony, what would you wear?

If you are putting on the characterization of bar wench, what would you wear?

If you are a member of the military, think of the details in your clothing that can change your rank.

The service you're with, what era you are role playing.

That there will be a different costume detail that can be used if you are a Napoleonic infantryman than if you were serving currently in Afghanistan.

You don't have to go all out unless that turns you on with your clothing for your role playing.

Choose things that work easily for you that there is a difference perhaps between wearing your good jeans and your beat up jeans for the role playing scene that you're doing.

Now, the other one that I mentioned though is wearing clothing for a fetish or a paraphilia.

There are people out there, and perhaps you're one of them, that know really sex isn't good until that one item is included.

That you know what?

Sex with your partner when they're naked?

Good times.

But sex with your partner while they are dressed in latex is orgasmic.

That sex with your partner when they are wearing your favorite rugged flannel shirt, in fact, when they're wearing any kind of flannel, the softness under your fingertips, that those things are a fetish, clinically speaking, or perhaps even a paraphilia if they are necessary, as in you can't even enjoy your sex without them.

Now, in the kink community, people refer to fetish wear all the time.

This is not what they're talking about.

They are talking about fetishes that are iconic.

It is leather and latex, PVC, spandex, lace, fur.

In modern parts of the kink community, we're starting to see neoprene.

This might also be military outfits, or those iconic characters mentioned before from role playing.

It could be denim and a tight white shirt.

These are all things that get referred to as fetish wear more earlier on the list than later on the list in most parts of the modern kink community.

So when you see people who say, dress according to dress code, come in fetish wear, it's often what they're talking about.

But not always.

If for you, you can show up and rock your high fullness of sexy self, wearing a flapper dress, long cigarette holder in hand, your hair pulled back with a strap and a feather, that can definitely be fetish wear.

Think about not just what is fetish iconically, but what you can rock to exude that fetishistic sexual energy through the way you dress.

If you are authentic in this, it will carry even more.

But it becomes an equation of sorts, again, creating that shared fantasy environment that a lot of us want to play in.

You might be feeling hot in your bananas in pajamas costume, but unless everybody else is buying into that being sexy, it might or might not help still create that shared fantasy environment.

But I did go.

The reason I bring that character up is that I did go to the New Zealand Fetish Ball in Christchurch a couple of years ago, and there were a pair of guys who showed up as bananas in pajamas.

And you know what?

They got a lot of play.

They got a lot of people drawn to them because it was creative, because it was unique, and because they showed that their clothing had them feeling fun and sexy, and it attracted to them people who wanted to be fun and sexy.

And so they ended up with someone on their arm.

It was a little bar wench from a Western kind of thing.

There was a girl dressed as Catwoman, and those girls were all over that banana, all over that banana.

Now, role playing and creating either having fetishes or creating a shared fetish environment, those are some reasons that we wear clothing that has us feel sexy or wearing specific clothing in a sexualized manner.

But we can also do it because we are enjoying the clothing itself.

If I run my hands that have been lubed up in advance, down your rubber-clad body, I can feel every single ripple of your flesh beneath.

I can see barely your nipples, and my lubed-up hands run up and down over the rubber, making it shiny and beautiful as you quake underneath.

Rubber, fur, soft cotton negliges, a silk business suit, long lines of lace, thin ribbons that are crisscrossing back and forth against your skin, the heavy chain detailing on the sides of your leather vest.

These are textures that can be sensual in nature.

Perhaps it's textures that are sadistic in nature, literally choosing to dress in a hair shirt, the scratchiness of our monk's costume digging into our skin as we kneel down on the ground penitent.

These clothing details can be sensuous desire details into and of themselves without even having to draw upon those iconic natures.

Sometimes things just feel good.

I know a fantastic couple that their thing is wearing stuff that is shiny and tight that clings to their body.

They love pantyhose.

Full encasement pantyhose outfits that cling to every bit of their body and running that up and down over his cock.

That thin texture and the grippingness of the silkyness to his balls feels exquisite.

That she loves running pants.

That they together have bought scuba wet suits.

And what they'll do is they'll both dress in these outfits, and then roll all over their bed together, feeling the textures of each other's bodies.

Or he'll be wearing that tight pair of pantyhose, and she'll slip her hand underneath and feel him.

Or pull up, go back over the clothing, so he can't quite feel her gripping around him, even though the fabric is transmitting every single sensation.

I also know a delightful gent whose mistress has him wear frilly thongs underneath his power outfits when he is working his very high and white collar job.

The cool thing with that is that you can have it be not even something that's feminizing or sissifying or silky, but it might be something that's about control for your partner any way they so choose.

So for example, it could be choosing something as simple as the color or cut of your partner's clothing.

Today, I would like you to wear these socks to the office.

Today, I would like you to wear these socks when you go out running or go to university.

Today, I would like you to wear these socks while you go to the construction site.

Today, I would like you to wear these socks.

And it might sound a little silly at first, but the fact that I know that you are wearing socks that I chose and that you know that you are wearing socks that I chose, even if no one else knows about these socks and even if we don't find socks particularly sexy, the control element can be present.

And maybe it's that you're going to post on the Internet to all your friends, I am wearing the blue socks that my owner has told me to wear.

Or I am wearing the pink underwear that one of my girlfriend likes.

You can do so and share with everyone on social media the details of your socks.

Or it could be your little secret that 400 miles away, your boyfriend said, hey, could you wear the little white socks with the ruffles for me?

And you can wear them underneath your stompy boots, right?

Underneath those stompy boots, and no one else has to know that your boyfriend said, hey, could you wear the little white socks for me?

It becomes that one perfect hidden detail.

Now, sometimes though, we dress for our partners because it will help get them in the mood.

What if it's not about role playing, but simply that when you pull out that pair of stiletto heels and slide them on, you know it's going to add a little bit of extra spice and get your partner turned on?

It might get us in the mood for a scene by taking the time to strip out of or strip our partners out of their clothing.

Having us end up naked and choosing not to wear clothing be part of what puts us into our altered state of mind, stepping out of the day to day and into something special, or maybe it's then dressing into something together, both dawning our artifacts of desire.

We could do this by creating bookends, as it were, that I will be the iconic mistress and you will be the iconic slave.

That I could dress as a villain and you could dress as my victim.

In doing so, we get to create pairs or groups, perhaps all of us going as a group of schoolgirls or schoolboys together, that we are able to show we are exploring this sexual theme or sexual experience together.

That the clothing creates that story.

And those clothes, if we're becoming the iconic mistress and iconic slave, we also have the ability to emphasize feelings of that specific role.

By putting on those thigh-high boots, I will say tonight, not only am I your mistress, I am your mistress.

Emphasizing that experience, that internal characterization, evoking that or even invoking it.

Now, some of these clothes that we put on, though, are used specifically to exaggerate certain body parts.

For example, fannyless pantyhose, right?

Just the crotchless pantyhose.

Those are there for both ease of access, but also to emphasize what we got going on.

It exaggerates, or in some cases, it displays, wearing a codpiece that puts everything front and center.

The story of O-dress.

So when people hear O-dress, it is these underbust dresses that, like, it's long, full-covering, midsection, sometimes long sleeves, a long skirt, but the breasts are completely out, open, and exposed, and the skirts have slits in them that are hidden, so that you're able to push the skirts out of the way easily and quickly and efficiently for spankings, for having sex, et cetera.

In that case, the O-dress puts the breasts on display, even if everything else is demure.

We might be using it as a means of exposing for seduction.

Maybe it's wearing that long skirt that has the slit that goes up just so high until you sit, and then it goes just a little bit higher.

Sometimes our clothes are there in our erotic exploration to be destroyed.

There was a scene I saw in Oregon a number of years ago where a woman was dressed in her wedding dress, tied up, and then they did a scene.

I'm not entirely sure it was a role playing, but it was definitely a scene where she was sexualized as the bottom, as the person thrown down to the ground, tied up and her clothes cut off of her while she was still being used.

And part of not their exposure, but the exposure for others with clothing, might also be being forced to put on clothes you don't like.

Right?

This is the difference between somebody enjoying getting to be an adult baby and somebody forced into having to be an adult baby.

Somebody being empowered as a man dressing as a woman, and embracing the power of femininity, and somebody being humiliated by being turned into a woman, which, shall we say, is not a very feminist perspective.

Because if you are humiliated by being turned into a woman, that gives me information, personally, as to your perspectives on women, and your perspectives on what it would be like to be a woman.

Now, that's not the case for everyone.

There are people out there who consider it humiliating for other reasons.

Rock on.

But I'm just encouraging people to assess a little bit what that whole thing is for you.

Though it is interesting if we look at clothing in our culture, that there is such a fascinating gendered story.

If we look at gender only having two genders, which is completely untrue, but we'll go with that myth for a second that says there is our men's clothes and there are women's clothes, right?

Because there is that story in our culture that women wear dresses, men wear pants.

It's a story.

It's not true, but stories are stories because they have a kernel of truth historically embedded in them or because our culture still sees them as having a truth inside them.

But when women in our culture wear pants, okay, that was a little bit of a thing a hundred years ago.

Oh, even a bit of a thing fifty years ago.

But it's getting less and less to be a thing.

There are times when women are still expected to wear dresses.

I know very few women who are doing heterosexual Christian weddings.

Where showing up in a white wedding suit is considered appropriate.

There are some people who do it, but it's a comparatively small percentage.

And I bring that up because when women do wear pants, cool.

When women choose to wear, quote, men's outfits, even men's cut suits, Marlene Dietrich.

If I am looking at Madonna, if I am looking at these icons of women's fashion, and they're wearing men's clothing, it makes it all the more alluring.

It's women being subversive and putting on men's clothes.

It's hot.

But when men wear dresses, it is seen as humiliating.

It is seen as making a farce.

It is seen oftentimes as being something not positive, which is why, however we feel about him in the current political situations, when Dennis Rodman back in the early 90s wore a wedding dress as a big tough guy, it was like, okay, he's taking the piss out of something, but he's also doing something pretty bold.

Men in skirts is profoundly gender-bending for some people.

That especially when men wear it with pride, men wearing it because they're ashamed or they're whatever, that's one thing because that enforces a heterosexist, not just heterosexist, but a male-empowering perspective that men are better than women.

But when men wear dresses and say, yeah, and I look awesome, it's huge.

It's a big deal in our culture, which I'm a little sad of, but I also find it fascinating.

I find it really fascinating.

And so the question then is, if that's the case in the world at large, what is it in the case of the sexuality and kink communities?

Because people bring up all the time, like, well, what is fetish wear?

And under the choices for women, you've got a lot of options out there of what's considered fetish.

Corsets and high heels and stockings and latex and dresses and the amount of clothes that are being made for women in general, as well as in the world of fetish, is a lot bigger than the list of what's available for men.

Literally, I had this explained to me during my gender transition.

I didn't really have to explain, but I had it just kind of pointed out, and then I went on this entire mental journey where in men's fashion, you basically got a choice for the bottom half of your body of shorts, jeans, slacks, business trousers, and maybe if you're going very blue collar, overalls, dockers, and car hearts, that's it.

That's it, right?

If those are your only choices on the bottom, like you got maybe five or six things in your mix-and-match on the magnet thing, you know, if that's all you got, the details become profoundly important.

What is embroidered on the back of the pockets of your jeans make it stand out.

The cut of your jeans make it stand out.

The fact that I am choosing to wear them low-rise as compared to high-rise changes the statement I'm making.

There are, quote, gangster jeans, and there are cowboy jeans, and they are profoundly different due to the detailing and the finesse of the cut.

That it does become such minutia.

To the point that when on Project Runway, I think it was two seasons ago, there was a menswear competition piece that it was so hard for classic fashion designers who were used to being able to do a broad spray or change the length of the dress even a centimeter at a time.

No, really, it has to be ankle length.

It has to be up to your waist or hips.

When you're having to worry about the exact placement on a plate and having to wonder about what color is your stitching going to be, to have it make a statement, it changes things, right?

But I bring this up in the context of fetish wear because there's these huge brush strokes that can be painted across women's clothing.

You know, all of these different costumes that can be go out and purchased and what a guy's got, right, is what I hear.

So I made a list.

I made a list for y'all for men's fetish fashion wear to choose from and think about.

All right, category one, leather.

Go for anything, bikers, vests, jackets, chaps, boots, leather pants.

Combine them with blue jeans or white t-shirts.

Leather.

Look at how it ties into gay cultural history if you're going to be doing leather.

And understand that there are icons that you are drawing upon there so that there is a difference between some kinds of covers and other kinds of caps.

Don't say you have to know all of it, but being aware if you're drawing upon biker culture or gay cultural iconic history, what you're pulling upon there.

Throwing that out there.

Armor.

Motorcycle gear and motocross gear.

I've been seeing more motocross stuff up here in fetish imagery in the last, you know, five or six years.

Cowboys.

You got a whole lot of play with there.

You got to play cowboy?

Mm-hmm.

Yum stuff.

All right, next category, uniforms.

We've got military from camouflage all the way up to high dress.

Think about the variety of time frames available there.

Think about military victims.

Now, that's pretty edgy, but there are people who find that kind of fetish wear sexy.

So, for example, if you are going for the full Japanese Edo period, martial arts, with armor and whatnot, full costume, who would be your victim?

Would it be the captured village boy who's been tied up in layers of rope, perhaps, or someone else as equally garbed who is struggling against the bonds?

Is it perhaps then playing under uniforms, looking at the uniform of the executioner?

In general, with uniforms, start thinking about the people who are in power.

Think about power dynamics.

Think about the rules that are being evoked by the wardrobe.

Think about the details of the covers and the insignias of the things you're wearing, especially when you're thinking about military outfits.

Now, you don't have to be specific, right?

You could just say, I am wearing this military outfit, and so therefore I am a military person.

Awesome.

But there are some people who really appreciate the details of their desires.

Think about uniforms.

Think about police officers.

Think about anybody who is in control amongst, within, outside of fighting conflicts.

Think about religious uniforms of different sorts.

And I don't just mean school boys, school girl.

I'm talking about nuns and priests.

Think about school boys and teacher.

Consider martial arts icons and costumes.

Think about blue collar uniforms, such as overalls and jumpsuits.

Prison uniforms, with of course prisoners being another option.

So you could go as the prison guard or in your full orange.

Now, some uniforms don't come up as often, but could be really fun to play with as a sexual fetish option and fetish wear, which could be the postman, the pizza delivery boy, the UPS guy.

Maybe you're going to play around with the gorilla outfit.

Okay, it's not much of a uniform stretch in here, but I'm trying, right?

There's also specific dress from different time frames that you need to think about, because really when we start moving backwards and forwards with time, you get another option of ways to dress in sexually alluring ways.

Consider the Victorian gentleman.

Consider the bootlegger from Prohibition Era.

Right?

Think about all different time frames from Roman outfits through, you know, French court costumes, and that men have a wide variety of options to choose from if you look backwards and forwards through time.

Now, the next major category for men, latex, body stockings, cat suits, jock straps, underwear.

Yes, I even saw white latex tighty whiteys recently.

Totally awesome in my opinion.

Latex aprons.

Now, that might sound a little strange, but it's incredibly hot.

I saw a guy at Folsom Street Fair in knee-high black leather boots and then a black apron that on his was leather actually, that cabed out just beneath his knees so you could barely see any skin in front other than this long apron thing and he had and his arms were open and exposed.

But if you turned around, everything, everything was exposed in back, which was like it was this really interesting like tease and reveal kind of experience that I thought was very sexy.

Think about heavy rubber.

There's a magazine out there called Heavy Rubber Magazine that mostly features women's clothes but has some cool stuff for men as well on occasion in the fetish world.

And heavy rubber is rubber max, you know, like a rain jacket, rubber boots, industrial gear, and the heavy rubber movement combines that stuff with gas masks and full biohazard costumes and the skin clinging stuff that I was mentioning before with other latex details.

And there's some really sexy stuff out there available in the heavy rubber world if you play around with it.

Next category I think of with men's fetish wear are harnesses.

Now, what I mean by that is, like if you look at gay men's leather stuff, you'll see like these chest cross straps that are leather that sometimes have little metal details to them.

Those are fun, but they're not just for gay men.

I see a lot of guys nowadays who wear chest harnesses that have either armored details to them or asymmetrical sometimes that are lines up and down the body that might represent submission, that might represent dominance, that might be decorative, or for some people are fetish wear that double as bondage, right?

Two for the price of one.

That's pretty cool.

Going down my list, sportswear.

Now, not every party you go to is going to consider sportswear to be fetish wear, so be warned of that ahead of time.

But it's pretty hot to play with sportswear icon images, if nothing else, or iconic little details, right?

So, jockstraps.

Clean, easy, simple, sexy.

A jockstrap combined with almost anything else, pretty good men's fetish wear.

Now, you could go that with a pair of heavy-duty boots, or gender fucking with that, and a pair of stilettos.

Or we could go back to classic sportswear and have it be the jockstrap, a pair of knee-high socks, and a pair of appropriate shoes to go with it.

Warning, though, if you're wearing your cleats or your spikes, make sure you're not going anywhere with nice floors.

Just going to throw that out there.

But those knee-high socks come in so many different colors, so many different details, and you can get the style that works best with your soccer costume or with your wrestling singlet.

All right, well, wrestling singlets don't usually have the long socks, but you get my concept, right?

But wrestling singlets are actually really popular in various points of the kink community, either made out of classical material, or out of rubber, or out of neoprene.

Some that are normal singlets and some that are the sexualized singlets, shall we say, with a hole cut for the asshole.

There are people who wear tight shorts, full soccer slash football costumes, football scuba, gymnastics, swim team, running, bicycling, basketball, baseball.

And again, some people out there might be like, really?

And other people are like, hell yeah, gymnastics outfits are sexy.

Scuba outfits are sexy.

And I've also seen people who go full out with their pads, like full American football, dress to the nines, helmet and everything at a fetish event.

So think of that as well.

There are people in the men's community who enjoy, not just men's community, excuse me, people who are men or prefer a male aesthetic or masculine aesthetic.

Because remember, men can wear whatever the hell they want.

I'm talking about things that I have seen at parties that evoke I am male or are wear at men's for men's parties, or are dudes who are looking for ideas that aren't, quote, quoting on women's clothes, unquote.

So you've got the skinhead look.

Bleached jeans, boots with different colored laces, suspenders.

This can be really enjoyable for some people as fetish wear.

Some people really delight in it.

Be aware of the cultural frameworks you are taking from and whether or not you are trying to say that you are in fact a white supremacist.

Just keep that in mind.

Next one, business wear.

Seriously, folks, if Fifty Shades Of Grey has given us nothing, they have brought back the power yet again of the man in a good looking business suit and that a tie is hot.

Getting a suit that suits you well and fits you well is amazing.

There's the hyper masculine image of power present there.

There's the ripped down businessman of the guy who was in the suit who has been kicked down to the ground, tied up, shirt ripped open, tie being used to gag him.

There is the business casual of just putting on a nice pair of slacks, nice pair of dress shoes, button down shirt with the top unbuttoned, just one, maybe some cufflinks.

Just looking good, looking clean and presentable.

There is the other end of business wear, which is the dandy, the lilac tie that goes with the perfectly pristine thin line outfit all the way down.

Perhaps there is a cravat instead.

The dandy.

And as a note, because of the hipster movement, dandies are not just fluffy anymore.

The dandy with the perfectly coiffed outfit with combinations of colors and patterns is a much bigger thing in culture nowadays and is carrying over into the kink community as well.

There's also the yuppie, which is less seen, but is again, something to play with.

And with the yuppie, we're looking at cream vests with V-cuts, we're looking at khakis, et cetera.

So think about those images as well.

Again, dandy and chiseled suits being far more seen in fetish wear and fetish communities than I see the yuppie at this time.

Now, there's also what I call men's lingerie.

And a lot of guys don't like hearing this term, but men's underwear, we'll call it that.

There's straight up underwear.

And there's, I know people who are like, oh, but men's underwear doesn't have that much variety.

Bullshit, I'm going to cry bullshit on you, right?

Because it's not just white tighty whiteys available from, you know, from jockey, though there's a lot of people that get turned on by plain white good looking underwear on men's bodies.

But there's all of the other variety out there nowadays.

Ginch, gonch, and to exist, and nasty pig, and just keep, there's some really cool looking men's underwear.

Look around nowadays, guys.

Jock straps, we talked about thongs.

There's the funny ones, of course, ones that look like elephants and whatnot.

But those tend not to be as common as going out to a fetish party, fetish where?

But if they turn you on, look at all of the variety of men's underwear out there.

Cock rings, okay?

It's not much of an outfit, but it says a lot as an outfit.

It's very presentable.

And for some people, there's also the sexiness of the slow revealing from long johns or a union suit.

And I'm not just saying that to make the Alaskans listening happy.

I'm serious.

There's that long red underwear that you unbutton slowly, put your hand underneath can be delightful.

There is, of course, women dressing in, quote, women's lingerie and clothing.

But there's also animal role costumes, puppies, horses, pigs, anything that goes with them and their handler counterparts.

But I do want to remind people of an entire section that became fetish wear very popularly back in the 60s and 70s and into the 80s, which is the Goth vampire, Goth and vampire, and even punk movements.

So if you combine that with modern times of the modern primitive movement, you end up with kilts, bondage pants and buckle pants, PVC trousers, long coats, things that have fishnet as arms or as fishnet, period.

You've got the entirety of, quote, Goth clothes, you've got men's corsets, which are not the same as putting on a women's corset.

Go look them up.

There's some really cool men's corsets out there and available.

And anything out of the world of Burning Man, whether that's furry leggings or UV reactive clothing, interesting hats, vests, think creatively about this stuff.

And again, going down to the detail, if you're looking for clothes for men to wear at fetish events and in a fetish spectrum and fetish play, look at those details.

Armbands, wrist cuffs, gauntlets, specific hats or covers and the messages they carry, collars from thin to thick all the way up to posture collars, and collars with ruffs, hankies and keys to say I am a top or I'm a bottom.

I'm carrying my keys on my left or my right.

Left hankies for top and right hankies for I am a bottom I want to receive.

Gas masks, wearing a mask at all.

Think eyes wide shut, people.

Really, there's some hotness there with masks and hoods.

Remember there, with all of this stuff, right, whether you're rocking and looking for all that stuff for men's fetish wear or just looking at playing with clothing in general.

What works for one person is not going to work for everyone.

And not everyone's into all of that stuff.

Talk with your partner about what they think is sexy.

Talk with your partner about what kind of clothes does it for them.

And before even talking to your partner, sit and talk with yourself.

Think for yourself having listened to all this stuff.

Like listen to the little swings you got along the way of like, oh, dress suit, okay, that'd be hot on my partner.

And tell them, oh, that I can wear a tight pair of jeans and a button-up vest, a tie, look a little bit on the, you know, a little bit on the dandelion.

Cool.

What's really sexy for me is to be an executioner.

Oof.

All right.

I want to be a mistress with you wearing nothing but a jockstrap at my feet.

Nice.

Think for you what's going to be hot.

And if the answer is a full animal mascot costume, do it.

There's a huge furry community out there.

Go be a furvert.

Rock it.

If what sounds amazing to you is to be petted down while you are wearing that full, heavy rubber outfit or the skin tight latex, own it.

Do it.

Love it.

Because whether it's leather or latex, neoprene, PVC, lace, fur, denim, or something else entirely, you get to choose what textures feel good to you.

And if the answer is a 1970s polyester suit, enjoy it.

You are allowed to have whatever textures turn you on, turn you on.

Listen to your own desires.

And if what makes you happy as a clam is to be naked as the day you were born, rock that, too.

Rock your diaper.

Rock your nudity.

Rock your pony costume.

Rock your sportswear.

Rock it.

Be you.

Have fun.

Create the consensual and creative environment that you and your partner, that you yourself, that you and all of your friends are wanting to craft together.

And rock it.

Because what is important is that you embrace your erotic authenticity, and clothes are an amazing tool for just that.

So thank you, everyone, for joining me.

You can find further information about me by going online and typing in Lee Harrington, but better yet, go to passionandsoul.com.

And if you type in Passion And Soul pretty much everywhere, FetLife, Facebook, Twitter, DeviantArt, et cetera, you'll find me.

I'm pretty easy to find.

So thank you again, fellow adventurers of sexuality and spirit.

This has been Erotic Awakening with Lee Harrington, and until next time, go out, dress for your delight, get turned on, and be authentically you.

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