Sex Magic and Moleskins

Moleskins. Little black books. They are my history, my books of shadows, the storyline of what I have learned and the map to get there. Back in 2006, I got my first Moleskin for the purpose of taking notes when heading to Berlin, and it quickly transformed into how I did so, period. I’ve developed a system of double brackets, tracking stops in sections, names and dates, class titles. When I sit down to write and try to remember who I got a concept from, I flip back through the tomes and make sure to cite the work properly. Since…

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140 Charachters

I pull out the phone and click a button. A space for 140 characters makes way for me, a place for me, welcoming my words out into the world. Social media is a tricky concept. We currently live in a world where these systems can be used to organize political campaigns, or to report on the volume of our defecation. To share pictures of our burrito or inspire the masses with thought-provoking articles. To complain about our aches and pains, or ask our friends for advice on what to do about them. For myself, social media has a complex place…

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Barebacking, “Safer” Sex, and Judgement

Over on Facebook, I made the following comment/post/statement: Am I the only one who gets skeeved out when folks post fetlife vids of bareback sex with folks they just met that night at a swingers party? It led to *quite* the flurry of responses. I realized that my responses were being much lengthier than the post was going to be handlable with, and that I had more thoughts about it all, so I’ve decided to come over here and blog. Bareback sex is cultural slang for skin-on-skin penetrative sex without “protection”. IE “to ride a horse bareback” is to horse…

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Move The Crowd Part 4 : PR, NEEDS, & Closing Out

Susan Lindner from Emerging Media PR put us through what she called PR Boot Camp. In part 2 of this series about the Move The Crowd mastermind I attended, I mentioned that my brain was full. Yeah, this was the place where the “wafer thin” bit of food was put on my tongue that was just too much – but instead of being wafer thin, it was a burrito. A tasty, super-nutritious burrito that I really wanted to eat. But that doesn’t help. It just made me not want to stop. Curious about what I had already been up to…

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Archetypes in the Mirror

I recently was going through pictures of me to update my website in, and found myself… processing. It is really jarring for me to now look back at images of me during my higher weight period. When in the midst of my gender transition (and later my time being very ill), I hit about 235lbs. Maybe a bit more. Unsure. My asthma was bad enough that I couldn’t climb a flight of stairs without stopping at one point. It seems that it is not uncommon for transguys with big chests to put on weight. We can strap our tits down,…

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Move The Crowd Part 3 : Privilege & Culture

Move The Crowd’s mastermind event shook me up. In the first and second segments about the event, I talked about some of the speakers they had, the alumni who presented, and the conversations that had brought me into some new consciousness even before the event had begun. But the day continued forward, and so did I. More inspiration, more reflection… embracing our collective MORE. Reshma Saujani took the stage. She didn’t want to, but she said that when Rha Goddess asks, sometimes you just do. She is one of Forbses 40 under 40, and just lost her election campaign. As…

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Move The Crown Part 2 : Think Big

As I mentioned in my previous post, on Thursday the 26th I had the pleasure, and challenge, of attending True+Paid+Good in Manhattan, NY. It was an intense day that kicked my ass… and I am still slowly chewing through it all. After Terry Young’s culture systems presentation, my brain was already full. That’s not a good sign. When our brain feels full, it’s often nice to sit down and process. Let our bellies, our bodies take it in. Otherwise, we gorge, gorge, try to take it all… and that one wafer thin piece leads to us spewing all over the…

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Move The Crowd Part 1 : Waking & Culture

On Thursday I had the pleasure of attending the mastermind event True+Paid+Good with the group Move The Crowd. Over course of 9 hours, our brains, hearts and spirit were challenged and inspired alike… and I was no exception. My mind, essence and being is still spinning, still absorbing, still taking it all in. My arms lift up, wrapping myself around it, feeling the sensations as it sinks in with pure light. Light lifts us up, light burns, light illuminates, light me afire. Let me say this – the time before the event was worth the price of entry. Two conversations…

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New Chapter – Less Travel Soon

A few years ago I was talking to Nina Hartley about a book idea that involved traveling and writing about sexuality communities as we went. She shared the specific vision, and I picked up on it as the conversation progressed. It sounded like a blast, and I said that it would rock to do it in a few years. It’s a few years later, and life is changing. I’ve come to realize that no, really, I can’t do my current travel schedule. There is a different between maximum capacity and sustainable capacity. Between living in Oregon and Maryland I spent…

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Plays of Theatre and Playground

In the world of kinky sex, the word “play” gets tossed around a lot. It gets used for the types of activities we are in to – knife play for example being a way to describe safe, consensual engagement with sharp objects as a form of sensation, power exchange, or to leave specific marks. It gets also gets used to describe a specific encounter, connection, or time period of interaction. Outside of kink, “play” evokes two different categories of interaction, and I think this ends up effecting the ways that the word play is used within the erotic encounters we…

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